The hand of the LORD has done this. (Job 12:9)
"Sometimes God lets a stinging blow fall on your life. You bleed, feeling the pain, and your soul cries out in agony. At first you think the blow is an appalling mistake. But it is not, for you are the most precious jewel in the world to God. And He is the most skilled stonecutter in the universe. Someday you are to be a jewel adorning the crown of the King. As you lie in His hand now, He knows just how to deal with you. Not one blow will be permitted to fall on your apprehensive soul except what the love of God allows. And you may be assured that from the depths of the experience, you will see untold blessings, and spiritual enrichment you have never imagined." (Streams in the Desert - April 17)
Some days are better than others for Todd and I. (and probably different even between the 2 of us). Last night was one of those nights that I lay in bed just crying out to God asking Him to PLEASE deliver Caed. It's not that he had a particularly bad day or we had received some bad news. I just long so much to see Caed back to good health and be the happy little boy he once was. I want God to tell me 'everything's going to be ok.' I want to be assured of a happy ending to this horrible nightmare. But, the truth is...we don't know how or when this is going to end. Our sight is so limited. But God in His Sovereignty has designed it that way. We are to hold so tightly to God's hand, and TRUST that He knows exactly where He's taking us and all the reasons behind Him choosing this difficult path for us (rather than the one of comfort and ease). He knows best!
Hear my cry, O God; listen to my prayer. From the ends of the earth I call to you, I call as my heart grows faint; lead me to the rock that is higher than I. For You have been my refuge, a strong tower against the foe. I long to dwell in Your tent forever and take refuge in the shelter of Your wings. (Psalm 61:1-4)
Today was pretty typical of the last several days. He rested a lot, threw up a few times, and walked 3 circles around the hallway. His walking his getting much better. Our main struggle is just sometimes "the battle of the wills." (he doesn't want to walk and we desperately need him to) Once he gets going, and sees we aren't going to back down, he then does very well. His temp. only reached 100.9 today which is good. The cultures from his broviac came back negative (or no growth). He really struggled urinating today. He just cried and cried and would tell me he was scared to go. I think it really hurts. The plan is to get a sample and see if there is any infection. However, he's on 3 really good antibiotics right now. You'd think if there was one, they would have taken care of it. Who knows? That's why I'm not a dr. (although I'm thinking I might earn some nursing points when this is over!) He may just be hurting from having the catheter in. They hooked his J-tube back up last night since he was vomiting. It has drained all day. In the morning (7:00), Caed will go in for another little surgery to remove the abdominal drain (forgot what it's called). They will also clean his other 2 dressings then (incision and broviac). Today Caed had some special visitors to come see him: Uncle Matt, Aunt Kristi, and cousins Kambree and Cannon from Belton. He smiled so big when he saw them. It didn't last long, but we take whatever we can get. Tomorrow two more special visitors are coming: Greg (or as Caed likes to call him...Jack) and Kristie from Edna. Caed LOVES Jack!! I know it will be such good medicine for him to see them. Please pray for Todd and I specifically. We both have colds now! (my mom and Caleb are also sick) We are just trying to wash our hands as much as possible and not hug and kiss on him for awhile. (which is very hard!) Thank you again for your prayers and support!! We love you!
5 comments:
Dear Todd and Lori,
We continue to lift Caid to the Lord for strength and healing. Thanks for the blog reports. They are a call to arms for prayer warriors far and wide. They are an amazing testimony of trust and faith that inspire me as much as they humble me before God. We love you guys. Randy and Jackie
We thank you oh God, for all things are possible for them who believe. We look to you tonight to do the things you promised you would do.
Lord, we will not give up, we will continue to stand on your Word. We believe.
Lord, we speak your blood covering again over Caed as he goes into surgery tomorrow to remove the drain tubes. We speak peace and cast down all anxiety that might come forth.
Lord, thank you for sending loved ones to Caed tomorrow. Give him much joy as they enter his room. Fill his room with unbounding love!! Your love.
Thank you Lord for your unconditional love for us that never ends. Amen!
All our love and prayers,
Randy, Nancy, Hillary & Matt
signing off @ 2:32 am.
Dear Hollingsworth Faimly,
it is addie checking in at 3am. i to would love to soo caed his normal self it is so sad and i know you are longing to see that glimpse of it still there. i love you guys so much and really want you to come home.i just pray tp God to heal caed and bring him home because it is what he needs now is to come home. i love you guys so much!!! addie
"Your love, O Lord, reaches to the heavens, Your faithfulness to the skies. Your righteousness is like the mighty mountains, Your justice like the great deep. O Lord, You preserve both man and beast. How priceless is Your unfailing love! Both high and low among men find refuge in the shadow of Your wings. They feast on the abundance of Your house; You give them drink from Your river of delights. For with You is the fountain of life; in Your light we see light. Continue Your love to those who know You, Your righteousness to the upright in heart." Psalm 36:5-10
"Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him..." Ps. 37:7a
"If the Lord delights in a man's way, He makes his steps firm; though he stumble, he will not fall, for the Lord upholds him with His hand." Ps. 37:23-24
"My soul finds rest in God alone; my salvation comes from Him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; He is my fortress, I will never be shaken...Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from Him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; He is my fortress, I will not be shaken. My salvation and my honor depend on God; He is my mighty rock, my refuge. Trust in Him at all times, O people; pour out your hearts to Him, for God is our refuge....One thing God has spoken, two things have I heard: that You, O God, are strong, and that You, O Lord, are loving. Surely You will reward each person according to what he has done. O God, You are my God, earnestly I seek You; my soul thirsts for You, my body longs for You, in a dry and weary land where there is no water.I have seen You in the sanctuary and beheld Your power and Your glory. Because Your love is better than life, my lips will glorify You. I will praise You as long as I live, and in Your name I will lift up my hands. My soul will be satisfied as with the richest of foods; with singing lips my mouth will praise You. On my bed I remember You. I think of You through the watches of the night. Because You are my help, I will sing in the shadow of Your wings. My soul clings to You; Your right hand upholds me." Ps. 62:1-2, 5-8, 11-12; 63:1-8
Some of my most favorite passages from Isaiah:
40:28-31
"Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Lord is the everlasting God, the Creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and His understanding no one can fathom. He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary; they will walk and not be faint."
41:10
"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strenghten you and help you; I will uphold you with My righteous right hand."
41:13
"For I am the Lord, your God, who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, 'Do not fear; I will help you.'"
Father,
Peace, rest, strength, courage, patience, trust - I ask for all of these as You cover Todd, Lori, Caed, and the entire family with Your loving hands and hold them in Your arms.
In Jesus,
Amen
Your friend in Albuquerque, Debbie
My heart breaks for the burden you carry. You must experience significant mental and physical exhaustion. That, along with the inevitable exposure to hospital illness, is more than one body can handle. I pray that you will rest and get well quickly and that the Lord will lift Caed out of this trial, that you will see significant improvement soon and catch a glimpse of the "end of the tunnel".
I know you so desperately want out and all those who pray for your family daily hope and pray for the same.
In Christ, Audra
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