Friday, October 31, 2008

Fri. 10/31 - update



Mr. Incredible..............Caed, you have no idea how fitting this costume was for you this year! You are such an INCREDIBLE little boy!! You have gone through more in the last 8 months than most of us will go through in a lifetime, and yet you are SO strong and SO brave. That smile and magnetic personality have kept us going more days than you'll ever know. You have made an impact on the world!!!! YOU are our super hero!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We love you!



Tinker Bell....................Reagan, your innocence, beauty
and grace shone through tonight. You truly were
sparkling!!!! You as well, have gone through a lot this year.
Thank you for being strong and flexible and being
such a big help to all of us. In so many ways, you have
had to step back and allow Mommy and Daddy's time
and energy to be placed on Caed. You are truly beautiful
inside as well as outside. We love you!




Just missing our little Caleb...............



This morning, the hospital had trick or treating
for all the Pedi patients. At least a hundred or more
employees lined up on 3 different floors to pass out
toys and treats.



Lauren (a nursing student) was our guide.
They filled their bags!!!!

Fall Festival

We went to the Fall Festival at Life Spring Church in Bellevue. It was awesome!!! Such neat prizes. The kids had so much fun!!!!


















Fall Pics 1


Minutes before, I was telling Todd
how Reagan always wins the cake walk.
Sure enough....she did again!



Caed won a 2 liter Diet 7up (perfect!)



This was the best game. So funny!
The man raised and lowered the donut
and Caed had to take a bite without
using his hands. It was especially
funny since Caed cannot eat donuts!!! ha!



She got it!!!



Reagan won the camo hat and gave it to Caed.
Minutes later, he won this puppy and gave it to
her!!! Then.....Caed won a giant teddy bear on
a tic-tac-toe game. He nailed it!!!

Fall Pics 2

SUPER MAN!!!! Caleb, this little suit once belonged to your big brother. You may not know each other very well right now, but we pray one day the two of you will have a very special bond. You were sent to us by God and at a time we once questioned. Now, we see more than ever what a tremendous blessing YOU are!!! We love you! Thank you God for always knowing best!

(thank you Mother & Daddy for sending this to us! The only thing that would have made this night any better would be to have him here too!!! Thank you for continuing to watch over him.)



Caed and his bud Joseph (or Jofus...as he calls him)



Reagan and her new friend Katherine



Can you say "a confused Lone Ranger?"



It's exhausting being a super hero

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Wed. 10/29 - update

Nothing really to report other than my computer got sick today. It is now in the hands of the faithful Geek Squad. Hopefully it will be back to new in no time. So, I am having to use the computers here in the Resource Room. Only bad thing (for me) is I can't upload any pictures.

Tomorrow is a big day for us. Todd is flying in! The kids are so excited and once again have BIG plans for him. We are planning on going to the Fall Festival at Life Spring Church (where we have been attending the past 6 weeks) on Friday. Reagan and Caed have their costumes ready and are very excited. I'm glad Todd will get to be here for it as well.

Todd coming brings great excitement, but honestly.....it saddens me. You're on such a 'high' when people come to visit, and then such a 'low' after they leave. This means I have only 6 more days left with Reagan. After they both leave, it's just back to Caed and I. It has been SO GOOD for him to have everybody here (especially his sister). I pray he doesn't get too depressed with no one left to play with.

Reagan will head back with Todd on Tues. I mentioned it to her today, and she got tears in her eyes. I KNOW she loves being there in Idalou. She has certainly missed her best buddy and cousin, Bergan. But, I guess it goes back to leaving Mommy & Caed again, and our family being separated further. Please begin praying for her. Pray for Tues. It's going to be a very difficult day for everyone..............................

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Tues. 10/28 - update


Quite a shock! We think "muscle man"
actually gained this week after
being sick!! (a few ounces) Thank you God!!



Reagan has a new nickname for Caed......
"turtle". (since he is always carrying his
shell on his back)

Speaking of backpacks, after we went down for his
weight check, I let the kids just play in the playroom
while I sat there in the lobby making lesson plans.
We were probably there 2-3 hrs. I saw
so many kids coming and going with their backpacks.
It was good for me. Most of them were 2 and under,
but I sat and talked to one girl who was 13. She just had
the STEP (lengthening) procedure this summer and was
telling me all about it. Her name is Sabrina.
Please pray for her. She was born with all these problems, so she
has been dealing with it her whole life. She was just so sweet,
and wanted to know ALL about Caed and his story. What an
encouragement she was for me today!! As well as seeing SO
many other SBS kids. For once, Caed was in the majority.



He is excited about all he is learning in "school".
We missed a whole semester last year, so we're
trying to catch up. He's doing wonderful!

Words from my "Father"

I have never posted a "comment" before, but this one was different. Many of you probably don't make a habit of reading other people's comments, so I wanted to share this very special one. It was from my dad.

As I shared in today's post, this was a very hard day for me. Nothing unusual happened. We did not receive any bad news. Everybody was feeling great! But, emotionally today.....I was at the end of my rope. I have been here many times before in the last 8 months. I can't possibly go into all the feelings I had....all the frustrations....all the fears....all the unknowns. But, simply that all the strength I thought I had left was gone (in my mind). Many of you have told me or left comments about "how strong" I am. I just shake my head. You don't see the real me! You don't see the tears. You don't see the impatience and anxiety. You don't see the sinful, selfish Lori!! I want to be very clear here: As so many of you know in your own experiences....any "strength" we have is not from US to begin with!!!! It is God who arms me with strength and makes my way perfect. 2 Samuel 22:33 I believe it is in times like today, times when I feel I can't go on.....these are the times I have taken my eyes OFF HIM and instead fixed them on my circumstances. As I already stated earlier, this evening was so good for me. The Lord used some dear sweet friends to encourage me. But, that wasn't all. After I got the kids in bed, I came to check my email and the blog one last time before going to bed myself. As I scrolled down (and kept scrolling and kept scrolling) I was thinking "who in the world sent such a long comment?" Then, I saw the word DADDY. My heart stopped. I quickly grabbed a chair and knew I was fixing to not only hear from my dad, but also from MY FATHER!!!! It was a reminder right then and there that HE WILL NEVER LEAVE OR FORSAKE ME! On such a difficult day like today.....HE once again provided. Thank you!


Dear Todd & Lori,

It's 11:00 Monday evening and I just read "constant reminders" for the "third" time today. Each time it made me recall many of those same moments you wrote about, and the memories made me cry those same tears all over again, and again, and again. But I want to tell you of how the Lord also reminded me of something this morning. As I was driving to work, Charles Stanley was preaching on the radio about how God works in our lives. Dr. Stanley reminded me of the truth that God is always (whether we know it or not) working "all things together for good". I know you are very familiar with Rom 8:28. You have quoted it numerous times in the blog over the last nine months. I know that you believe with all your heart that God "is" working behind the scenes in ways that we may never know in full or even in part.

But I would like to let you know of two phone calls I received today. They were not unusual in any way. In fact, almost "every day" someone tells me in person, in letter, or phone call the same thing that each of these people said today. Each told me two things: they are praying for your family, and they are greatly blessed, strengthened, and encouraged by seeing you and Todd truly live out your faith. Remember that these were just two of the hundreds (if not thousands) of people who are "Curious about Caed". As you well know, that group of people now extends literally around the globe. Would you have believed that eight months ago? Need I say more about "God works all things for good"?

I am not writing this to bring honor to either of you, but to honor the One (the only One) who has the power to bring good out of what we would call not good. If HE fails to do as HE promised, HE is either a liar, or an impotent God who cannot do as HE said. We all know that HE is neither. We all know that the Rom 8:28 promise applies to us, "his children". We all know that HE is more than able, and whatever HE says HE will do, HE will do.

Lori, I want to remind you of another time when you received some news that you were not "particularly happy to receive at that moment". Remember when you learned that you and Todd were expecting #3. Remember the thoughts of "Oh no, not now, Why now?, I can't do this right now, etc, etc.) Remember the letter I wrote you in the form of a "parable". Remember in the story, how God had a very special little boy to send, but HE needed to find some very special parents for this little one. Remember how HE searched the world over to find just the right parents for this little boy. Remember the overwhelming joy that these special parents experienced when at last "that special little one arrived". When I wrote this story as encouragement for you, I of course had Caleb in mind.

But now looking back on the last eight months, I see an even greater analogy in the story. I truly believe that Caed is that "special little boy". I believe that even at his young age, God has already given Caed gifts and talents that someday will be used to glorify God in mighty ways.

But until that times comes, this little boy needs some "very special" parents. He is going to need love, attention, care and answers to those difficult questions such as: Daddy, when can I ______? Mommy, how much longer _____? Daddy, why me? Mommy, can you make the hurt go away?

Many, if not most, of the days during the last eight months have been very difficult to say the least, and there will be difficult days ahead. But every day that passes means we are one day closer to the day when God's plan for Caed (HIS promise to bring good) will be revealed to you. (at least in part) And what a glorious day that will be!!!

But in the meantime, your job is to keep on keeping on. Keep on trusting, keep on praying, keeping on blessing. Even though there may be times when your heart is literally breaking, just as Caed's favorite song says, "Blessed be YOUR name".

In closing, I want to say that the purpose of this letter is not to bring honor and glory to you, but to remind you of the ONE that enables you to do what you must do each day. But Lori, I want you to know what a blessing you have always been to me. No father could be more proud of a daughter that I am of you. And Todd, I want you to know what a blessing you are to me. When you give Reagan away someday to that special young man that God has for her, I pray that he will be the "man of God", and the "spiritual leader of his family" that you are for Lori, Reagan, Caed, & Caleb.
I love each of you more than I could possibly put in to words.

Daddy.

One final comment to those people around the globe who are "Curious about Caed". If you are among the many that lift this family daily in prayer, thank you, thank you, thank you. You are a blessing to us inexpressible.

Monday, October 27, 2008

Monday, October 27, 2008

Mon. 10/27 - update

Today was a tough day for me emotionally. I just kept telling myself, "I can't keep doing this!...I have nothing left to give!" However, just as He continually does, the Lord gave me just what I needed for today.

Carol and Cordell invited the kids and I out for supper. They also invited another family we have grown to love. It was wonderful. Reagan and Caed played downstairs with their 2 children and I was able to have 3 "desperately needed hours of strictly adult conversation". We laughed a lot, told stories, and just simply enjoyed each other's company. It may not seem like a big deal, but for me.....this was straight from GOD!! He knew how down I was all day, and He provided a simple meal with some wonderful new friends to encourage me, lift me back up, and give me just enough strength to carry on another day.

Thank you Cordell, Carol, Jeff, Julie, and Dot! I know you had NO IDEA how heavy my heart was tonight. Thank you for simply including my family and for loving us!!!! Please know that God is using you (even when you may not realize it!).

Your love has given me great joy and encouragement, because you, (my dear friends), have refreshed (my heart)!!!!! Philemon 7

Saturday, October 25, 2008

constant reminders

The kids have both fallen asleep without me. I am exhausted. I need sleep. However, the Lord is speaking to me especially tonight. I could count on one hand the number of times I have been able to sit in stillness and silence since being here. When you live in one room with your kids, it's hard to "get away." I have longed for a night like this.

I specifically remember the morning after Caed's initial surgery standing in PICU just staring in disbelief at my baby whose face was swollen and a ventilator taped to his mouth. I can still hear the steady beeping sound of the monitors and machines. "What in the world just happened? Just less than 24 hrs. ago, he and Reagan were playing at the park with Todd. How could our lives have literally turned upside down in the blink of an eye?"

Now, to really think back to everything that has gone on the last 8 months.....well, quite honestly I get sick to my stomach when I do. And yet, I find myself going there every single night before falling off to sleep. Even now, as I sit here in "silence, " the rhythmic sounds of Caed's 2 pumps are constant reminders. Giving nightly hugs and kisses is different now. He isn't the same little boy all curled up with his blanket. All the tubes, gadgets, and pumps surrounding his bed and protruding out of the sheets are constant reminders. I have actually gotten used to his backpack. Most days I forget he's even wearing it. But, the times I do take notice are when I see someone staring or I hear the usual comment, "Did you go to school today?" (I think this one is especially funny when they say it at night or on weekends! Do they really think he would still be wearing his backpack? ha!) Don't get me wrong either, I in no way take offense to the comments about the backpack. I fully understand that people have no clue that he's actually hooked up to it! I sure never knew kids wore them for things like this. It is a first for me too. But, when we are out and his pump starts beeping, etc... (especially quiet places like church or the movies), I notice people around becoming very curious. Again, it becomes a constant reminder. Every bath and every time Caed changes clothes......again, it is a constant reminder. Having to monitor (and record) everything he puts into his mouth and everytime he goes to the restroom.....a constant reminder. The cabinets and counter spaces that are full of meds and supplies.....a constant reminder.





My entire life is now centered around Caed and his illness. I KNOW that I am not the only one. I KNOW that many of YOU reading this right now likewise are dealing with those constant reminders. Those things in life that you just can't escape, as much as you would love to. They are there when you wake up in the morning, surface many times throughout the day, and again are right there with you as you lay your tired body down to sleep at night.

Last week during our clinic visit, Dr. Mercer made a simple statement to me. I know he said it strictly from a physician's point of view. He thought nothing of it, and in all honesty, there really isn't a lot to it. BUT....I don't think I heard much else he said after these 4 little words rolled off his tongue. " Maybe when he's 7........we can try to take the G-feeds away." This wasn't necessarily something completely shocking to me. We have always known it will take lots of time. But, this was the first time any dr. put an age to it. I know....it's only 2 years. I know how fast 2 years will fly by. But, to think we will still be going through all this? Mixing the formula everyday, setting the pump and attaching it to the backpack, holding it everytime he goes to the restroom, all the meds, and on and on................... The one thought that kept going through my head was "t-ball!!!" ha! Crazy I know. I just don't know how "normal, rough and tough little boy things" fit into the equation. It's one thing for Caed to be playing baseball or football, etc...with his Daddy, but when will he finally get to be on a real team??? Something he talks about so much. I know as I'm writing this, I'm sounding so petty. I know there are children out there who will NEVER get to do those "normal" things. And here I am whining about a couple of years possibly! I think it's just the grieving process. I have always equated 'grief' with death. I am finding out now that grief is simply dealing with a loss. Any loss. Big or small. I know Caed has also (in his own way) been going through this process as well. I am also aware that in all honesty, 2 years is not the end. Caed has a chronic illness. This will follow him for the rest of his life......for the rest of our lives. It can easily become very overwhelming for me though to think about that. I guess I am still learning. Learning to be a parent of an ill child. Learning to stop having these unrealistic expectations of what I think my life "should" look like. (something right out of the movies, mind you...ha!)

Everyone has a story. Everyone has that "one really tough thing" that they have to deal with at some point in their lives. Sure, some seem to be worse than others (in our eyes), but never the less, no one is exempt. It doesn't matter how "good or bad" you think you are. It doesn't matter what kind of life you have lived. Trials are simply inevitable. It's how we choose to respond to them that do matter. We are all sinful. None of us will respond right everytime. Our human nature screams for us to run from trials. To want to curl up and let them defeat us. I believe when we allow God to work in us, to trust Him, and fully acknowledge that our Sovereign Lord indeed DOES have purposes for everything......our trials (the very things that we think are bringing us down) can actually make us stronger! And this requires a daily sacrifice. We have to choose every single morning, everytime those "constant reminders" rear their ugly head, to TRUST....to be thankful for God's love and mercy....to feel Him holding us and carrying us through.....and know that He will never leave or forsake us!!!

I do hope that we don't get too used to the "new Caed." Even though everything is becoming so routine, and there might even come a day when we don't notice the backpack, or pumps and tubes like we used to; I pray that God doesn't allow us to forget. I pray that He will continually use it all to be a constant reminder of His Goodness, His Faithfulness, His Grace, and above all His LOVE for us!!

On my bed I remember You; I think of You through the watches of the night. Because You are my help, I sing in the shadow of Your wings. My soul clings to You; Your right hand upholds me. (Psalm 63:6-8)

Friday, October 24, 2008

Fri. 10/24 - update

We have survived today! It started out very early, and very cold and wet. However, my mom and Caleb made it back just fine. She said he did great on the flight. I think my mom deserves an award! Not only for traveling alone with a baby, but especially for being able to change his dirty diaper in the "spacious" airplane lavatory!! Bravo Nana!!

Caed has really done well today. In fact....I was so shocked when my alarm went off at 4:45 this morning, and I had not had to get up with him to go to the restroom all night! Huge deal!! So far, he has only gone 5 times today! He never once complained about his tummy hurting either.

The LORD will sustain him on his sickbed and restore him from his bed of illness.
(Psalm 41:3)

I have also done surprisingly well today with Caleb leaving. Don't get me wrong, my heart literally was aching as I watched them walk through security. I think it would have been much worse had we gone with the original plan and Reagan had to leave too! Todd is planning on flying up on Thurs. and then Reagan will head back with him the following Tues. Now...that I can tell you is going to be a very difficult day! After having his sister here to play with for almost a month and then it just being the two of us again.....it's going to be tough. However, I'm hoping by then, we won't have too much longer to be here.

Caed also had his weekly dressing change today. However, it was a little different in that his nurse was teaching me how to do it. Last week, I just watched (for the 30th time since it all began) and took notes. This week, the plan was for ME to actually do it while she watched. It was more difficult because Caed is used to me holding his hand, and today that was not possible. I had to keep telling him he couldn't touch me! (hard to do as he's crying wanting me) It's a very serious procedure because you have to be very sterile. This line goes into a vein near the heart. That's why line infections are a bad deal. They can attack the heart. Anyway....let's just say I have a really unsettling feeling about doing it. Our nurse told me that 1/2 of the parents do it themselves, and the other 1/2 have a nurse come do it. I know a couple of people personally that do it to their kids, but.....I don't know. I have confidence with all the other "nurse duties" I have had to take on, but for some reason I just don't have a peace about this one. Our nurse told me when she left that she would continue to come and show me and help until I felt good about it, but I don't know if that will ever happen. This has been such a traumatic experience for Caed from day 1, and now here we go changing it up on him. You would think he might like this better, but he kept telling me today, "I want her to do it!!" I think he smelled my fear! ha!

Todd just called and told me that there is a possibility one of the radio announcers for the Texas Tech football game tomorrow is going to give a shout out to Caed! How cool! They play Kansas at 11. I have included the link to the radio broadcast (Tx. only), so if you think about it and you're out driving around this time, tune in and see if you hear Caed's name. I know the game is being aired on ESPN, so many of you will probably just watch it. But just in case.........be listening!

http://texastech.cstv.com/sponsorship/radio-affiliates.html#fb





Loading up - 5 am



They were packed in like sardines - having
to sit on the suitcase because there wasn't room
in the trunk.



Do you know how hard it is seeing this empty now?




Also....how difficult it is passing by their
room!

The Reagan Hollingsworth Show (episode 2)

Thursday, October 23, 2008

Thur. 10/23 - update

The Land of the Living has returned. Last night was really tough!! I got sick the same time Reagan did, and Caed has been struggling with it the last couple of days. Everyone was miserable at the same time. ugghhh! My mom decided to bunk in with us last night so she could help if I got really sick and couldn't do night duty for Reagan & Caed. I was up literally every hour with Reagan and Caed both. (but by that time, I was doing better, so it wasn't too hard other than just being exhausted) This morning, Reagan and I could really see improvement. Caed however, was still not doing well.

I guess I should back up...........Tues. night (when my mom was still sick and I had all 3 kids), Caed began really hurting and having lots of diarrhea. (14-16x day) I could tell he had some fever, but I didn't have a thermometer. When Caed gets fevers.....it's a scary thing. (sign of possible line infection, which is NOT GOOD!!!) It was almost 10pm and I was frantic. I had to find a thermometer! I had given him some Tylenol, but I was more worried about the middle of the night and it getting really high. I loaded all the kids up (put Caed in the stroller and just carried Caleb) and searched this hospital over. You would think that would be an easy thing to get a hold of here. Finally, I went up to Labor and Delivery and with tears in my eyes, begged one of the nurses to please check Caed's temp. It was almost 101 then. Again, it was great to get an exact number, but it didn't solve my dilemma. I just went back to the room, called Todd and did lots of praying through the night. I even set my alarm (in the rare case he slept longer than 4 hrs.) to give him more Tylenol. That was my 2nd 'all-nighter'. That next morning, we went down to the lab to draw cultures from his line to check for infection. So far, all is clear!!! Praise God! This was a huge concern. We drew labs again today as well. They said everything looks ok. His CO2 level is a little low, but understandable. His magnesium was also low, but again considering....they are not worried. The drs. basically told me that more than likely he just has this 'junk' that we all have had. The only problem is it affects him harder. An intestinal bug is hard enough on us normal folk, but with someone with all the issues he has, it's really rough. You know, a few days ago I was praying that he wouldn't get this. However, I found myself yesterday praying he DID have it! (a stomach bug would eventually go away) Caed never threw up (opposite from the 4 of us), but he mainly has had pretty intense pains, severe diarrhea, and low grade fever. Last night about 2:30am, Reagan and Caed both got sick at the same time. Caed was on the potty crying and Reagan was bent over the trashcan. We had a pretty major moment. ha! For the first time since all this began, Caed was witnessing someone else sick. He got really quiet and his eyes were so big. I kept trying to reassure him that this sickness was not just HIM! That we ALL had it and we ALL were throwing up, etc... I think it finally hit him when he saw Reagan. I know this sounds bizarre, but it was really good for him to see that. For the last 8 months it's all been about him throwing up and being sick. He has been doing so well for several months now, and I know it was really frustrating to get sick again. I truly think it helped relax him a little.

We have started Vanco again. His stool sample has not come back yet, but they are checking for more c-diff. Brandi told me it is very likely it has resurfaced because of this virus going around. We stopped his feeds quite a bit the last 2 days just to give his little body a break. We also stopped the Imodium thinking it might even be making it worse (cramping).

I ran to WalMart this afternoon, and when I came back you could just see such a change in Caed. He really was acting more like his self with more energy and less crying. The potty times are still quite frequent, but at least he is not in severe pain when he goes now. Tonight as we were getting ready for bed, he started crying again with tummy pains, but it didn't last too long. I think it's going to just take him a little longer to get over all this than for the rest of us.

We have re-scheduled my mom's flight AGAIN (for the 3rd time)! Kendell bless you! You have been such a blessing throughout all this especially. (she works for Southwest and has helped us out tremendously with all the booking and changing of flights, etc....) My mom and Caleb will (Lord willing...ha!) fly out tomorrow. I hate so much all that we have had to go through this week, BUT.....I did get an extra 3 days with him! I wouldn't trade anything for that. I begin to get really sad again thinking about him not being here, but now in my head, I can picture him, and I also know it won't be too terribly long until we see him again!

THANK YOU SO MUCH for praying for us! I know this sickness is going around everywhere. No matter who you are or what the circumstance, it's not fun. The good thing is that it doesn't last very long. (unless you're "Gut Boy!") Please continue to pray for him in this area specifically. I'm sure he will have lost more weight this week again because of all this. Just makes you feel like 2 steps forward....3 steps back!



Caed stayed in bed a lot the last few days



Then.....look what I see when I walk into the room
this afternoon! (with Nana babysitting) ha! I think
we are feeling better!!!






Wednesday, October 22, 2008

Wed. 10/22 - update

Sickness spreading rampant in our room. Please just pray. Been a very difficult 24 hrs!! (Caed, Reagan, and me) My mom has now canceled her flight home for the 2nd time to help out.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Tues. 10/21 - update

Well........we definitely had a short night, all right, but it wasn't because of an early flight. My mom was pretty sick last night with a stomach bug. I went and got Caleb around 3:45 am. Between Caed and Caleb, I finally got in bed by 5:45. However......surprisingly I don't feel too bad today. It's been a good day actually. This has been the first time in a long time that I had the 3 kids completely alone. I hate so much that my mom got sick, but just like all things, I think the Lord has purposes for everything!! Two that I can think of is: 1) it gave me confidence that I can do this. I was able to get all Caed's meds together and administered, go to a dr. appt (w/ all 3!), do school for Reagan and Caed, and also take care of Caleb all by myself. Not saying it was easy, but "do-able." 2) I think this has given my mom a long overdue "break." The throwing up stopped and today she was able to just sleep. Something I know she desperately needed. Our plan is for her to take it easy again tomorrow, and then see how she feels Thurs. morning.

Caed's dr. appt. went well again. He actually lost a lb. this week, which I was very concerned about. However, Dr. Mercer made me look him right in the eye and said, "I am NOT worried." He feels like it could simply be water weight he lost. Since we drastically decreased Caed's IV fluids this past week, he thinks it could just be that.

The GI dr. was there today and he wants to go ahead and get Caed started on growth hormones. His level is so low it's untraceable. Todd and I are very in favor of this and hope it can also help his bowel.

They want us to skip clinic next Tues. and simply come in for a weight check. We will also draw blood on Thurs. and Mon. (as usual)

The following clinic visit (Nov. 4th), they will see how his labs look and possibly decrease IV fluids again (probably down to just 3 hrs. /night).

They want to do another small bowel series in January. They will look to see if his bowel is dilated anymore. If so, they will then take a serious look at the lengthening surgery.

Again, they told me how well Caed was doing. Dr. Mercer said that was why he has been pushing him so much. If Caed continues to lose weight, he said "we will simply slow down.....no problem."

We will stop the Gentamicin this week (start back up the following). Also they want to double the dosage of Caed's Imodium. I didn't notice it helped at all this week (still had about 8 stools/day), so hopefully increasing the dosage will make a difference. Pray it does!! They also want me to increase his tube feeds the next 2 weeks and get up to 100 ml/hr. (he's been at 90 for a couple of weeks).

You know, I was so dreading Caleb and my mom leaving. This is sure not the way I wanted a few extra days. I just pray that Caed or I (primarily) do not get the 'bug' next. I know it is going around.

Thank you for your prayers concerning my mom and also me. We made it through today, and my mom is feeling some relief (just exhausted).



Thanks Russ! Boy was he excited
when he saw it!!



...he told me, "I think it's too big for me" ha!



Thank you Butler Family! They nagged me
all night and this morning to get to paint their
motorcycles. Finally, they got to and loved it!!!


The Reagan Hollingsworth Show (episode 1)

prayer request

My mom just called (2 am) and she has the stomach bug! We will need to reschedule their flight back home. Caleb is in a pack-n-play down in her room. Please pray for her (especially), but also for the rest of us. Primarily CAED!!! Like I've said before, we know he will get stomach junk.....it's just that it's going to be so hard on him. Anyway, as long as my mom remains sick, that leaves just me to do Caed and Caleb duty. (two very time consuming tasks!)

Caed has his weekly clinic appt. this morning. Pray all goes well for me to take him. (along with Reagan and Caleb)

We decided to leave Caleb down in her room for now (since he's sleeping). Pray for him to sleep ALL night! (or either an easy transition down here)

Pray she will feel some relief very soon!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Not much else is worse than vomiting and nausea! (especially when you're not at home)

Monday, October 20, 2008

Last day w/ Caleb 10/20 - update











This will be short tonight. We have to get up at 5:00 in the morning to take my mom and Caleb to the airport. It was a wonderful last day (if that's really possible). At one point my mom needed to get some things done with packing, etc...so I took the kids downstairs to the playroom. As I sat and played with them, I also just watched and listened. It was so good for my heart. The Lord gave me a glimpse of what's to come! I am so ready to get to our home and for the 3 of them to actually play together. (something they have yet to experience) Sure....I am scared. I feel totally overwhelmed just thinking about everything. But, our present situation (extreme separation) has caused me to long more than ever for our family to get back together. The Lord has given me a peace that I cannot explain.

...the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. (Philippians 4:7)


My precious Caleb..........oh! I'm going to
miss him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!




Caed's good friend (Reid) from Celina called him today

Sunday, October 19, 2008

3 of my greatest blessings

My heart is full tonight. I have spent a wonderful week with my parents and Reagan / Caleb. It has of course flown by..... and now we only have 1 day left. We have decided to let Reagan stay here until Todd flies up the end of Oct. (then she will head back when he does) We gave her the choice, and she was very excited to get to spend a few more days here with Mommy and Caed. (and also get to see her Daddy soon as well) I am SO thankful for this week! However.....I am already dreading tomorrow knowing it will be our last with Caleb.

The Lord knew how desperately I needed to see Reagan and Caleb, but I have also seen that He had another reason for the visit. I will not go into detail, but simply to say God always knows best!!! When we cannot see or understand His ways, we are told to simply 'trust.' Just like a parent to a child. There continue to be many things that I DO NOT understand. But....I am thankful when God sometimes shows us and gives us glimpses of the 'big picture.' He has done that for me this week.







Kiss #952...........



Kiss #953.........







Reagan and Caed have had lots of fun together. However, like I was telling Todd last night on the phone......Caed has sure been getting in lots of trouble this week as well. I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that he is so excited to have her here. He has been a little wild. ha! Also, the weather has been cooler (& some rain), so they have had to be cooped up in this room a lot. Never a good thing for a 5 yr. old boy especially. Despite a few 'minor fights'.....I can tell it has been so good for them both. This past year has been pretty tough on the two of them. They have always been close and since they are homeschooled....they are each other's primary playmate. I love that! They have had to be separated close to 5 months since this all happened. I am SO glad Reagan is able to stay here with us a couple more weeks! Not just for Caed and her sake....but also MINE!!! I have been taking over her schoolwork again this week, and I realized how much I have missed it. (although my mom and I have laughed at the fact that I prepared lesson plans for her while I was gone, but now my mom is one who has had to tell me what is going on. The sub is having to make plans for the teacher! ha!)

We had a good day today. And even though tomorrow is going to be tough (emotionally for me!), I don't want that to affect our last day together. Pray we can have another great one!!!!!



Sun. 10/19 - update


All ready for church



Play ball!



They had been wanting to go to the park all week.
Finally, we had a beautiful day!!











**HAPPY 1st BIRTHDAY cousin Cannon! Wish we could have been there to celebrate with you all!