JOY to the world

Shout aloud and sing for JOY.................(Isaiah 12:6)


Being back here in Idalou at my parents' house is wonderful. Just the joy of being with family comforts my soul. However, everywhere I look......there are memories of some 'very tough days.' I had to clean out the pantry (aka. Medical Supply Central). I experienced both joy and sadness in doing so. Joy in the fact that SO much of it could be thrown away!!!!! A bucket full of medicines, tubes, etc....that are no longer needed. Praise God! Maybe "sadness" is the wrong word to use. I wasn't 'sad' I was throwing it all away, but just reliving the painful memories of having to use it all. Remembering what life was once like here. The exhausting days and nights! As Caed got into his little bed 2 nights ago, again I was filled with happiness of just being here, but also sick to my stomach. Seeing the old supplies nearby and having flashbacks of him in that bed crying for hours in pain did not settle well.

Outwardly our little rambunctious Caed is back! It's as though none of this ever happened. However, seeing him hooked up to his backpack continually, having to carefully monitor what enters his mouth (and record it), give the daily meds, have a weekly blood draw, and guard his infamous "poop journal"..........remind me again that he is not the same. I'm not sure if fear will always be apart of my heart now. The "what ifs" continue. Will he have a setback? Will there come a point where he no longer improves? I try desperately to stay optimistic, but satan of course creeps in ever so often and whispers those lies of fear and doubt into my head.

I am eternally grateful for his progress. We are home. We are a family of 5 again. We are able to go and do things that normal families do. I don't take them for granted. Just a few days ago, we were in WalMart, and my mom reminded me of the first time we took the kids there after Caed had been discharged from the hospital. He did not even make it to the front door before we had to stop in the middle of the parking lot......get out his throw up bag.....and then drain his G-tube. I was so excited to be taking him into a real store again!! As he sat in the basket, joy flooded my soul. I wanted to scream out "Look at us! Look at my little boy! You may think we are just a normal family doing some shopping. We are not! This is a HUGE moment for us!"




However, once again.....we were reminded of how sick he still was when we had to stop every 10 minutes or so and "drain his tube" because he was crying so hard from stomach pains. The stares.........I wanted to scream out this time "Leave us alone!!! He is just a sick little boy trying to experience something 'normal' again. He hasn't been out in public in over 3 months!!"

................................fast forward.............. 2 days ago, I am having to get on to him for running in that same store! There is JOY!! Sure, we still experience the stares at times (with his tubes), but I don't mind a bit.

I want people to get a GOOD LOOK at what God has done for this little boy. Caed is our miracle, and we want to share him with the world..............................!!!!!!!!!!!!


One of the daily entries in the journal we kept at the hospital. Looking back over this notebook was heart wrenching!!!!!



Off to the garbage!!

Thank you Lord for Your Faithfulness....for Your Mercy on Caed....thank you for reminding us through pictures like this of YOUR HEALING POWER!!!!


There was once a day these little bags were glued to our hips 24/7