Looming questions...

Friday night Caed went the whole night (HOOKED UP...even!) without a single pain spell. First time in over a week. We were SO encouraged, and so thankful for all of you praying on his behalf. This morning, however....he awoke about 5:30 whimpering and crying out for us. We went through our normal routine, and after about 10 minutes, he was back in bed. It wasn't 30 minutes later, we heard him crying again. This pattern continued (like clock work....every 1/2 hour) until around 10:00a. Todd and I were completely stumped.....and of course distraught. He then had a couple more spells throughout the day. Overall, however, it wasn't too bad. (we've certainly had worse!) He made himself a pallet right beside our bed tonight....and we decided not to do feedings. His little gut definitely needs a break and his body needs REST! We will be in touch with Nebraska obviously tomorrow to see what they think. His sbs is scheduled for Thurs. here at Covenant. I'm assuming we will try to wait that out, considering he does ok between now and then.

SO many thoughts are running through my head. Most of which I am trying to ignore. (coming from satan) It's almost funny however, the verses I am coming across or the songs that "by chance" are coming on the radio. A couple in particular I like to call "Caed's songs." They are by David Crowder and his CD was in our car the day/week all this first happened to Caed 3 yrs ago. These songs hadn't made it to radio yet...but they were played over and over and over as I would sit in the parking garage of the hospital (hitting the repeat button).....desperately trying to pull myself together before going in to see Caed each morning. In fact, not sure I have ever heard them on the radio until just a few weeks ago. I kinda have to laugh at that....it's literally like God is sitting in the passenger seat of my car saying..."I haven't left! I'm still here! And I'm still holding your little boy in my hands. Nothing is happening to him that I am not in control of. This ("setback") may have surprised you....but not ME!"

A "Blessing in Disguise" is truly my main prayer these days. I don't know what on earth is causing this pain in Caed. And WHY now? He has been as "normal" as can be for so long. He's one of the "healthy ones"....according to the IRP Team. What is different? What did I do that may have caused this? The answer to these questions continues to be nothing. We desperately want answers, but the means by which they will come.....not so much. Our trip to UNMC this summer was supposed to be easy. Caed was doing SO well....they didn't see the need in exposing him to any more radiation (through an sbs) than absolutely necessary. We had told Caed this (several months ago), and he remembered. Recently, he asked again, "...so when we go to NE, all we have to do is blood draw and talk?" YES Caed! That's IT! Then, we can go to the zoo and do all those fun things you love so much in Omaha. ......my heart breaks for him now! Caed is almost 8 yrs. old. It's been a long time since he has had to do a lot of the "harder" tests. 3 years ago, we were 100% immersed in everything hospital life offered. Those "tough tests" came weekly....if not daily for MANY months. Now....we have experienced a very healthy span of about 2 years. This is a learning experience for us.....as well as Caed. These tests will come again....and again.....and again during his lifetime. I believe he will have those "healthy seasons" and then naturally have bouts of short gut issues. I sat thinking about his future wife tonight. (bless her dear soul...haha!) But the fact that she will have to learn SBS. She will one day (Lord willing) be the one that is with him during the x-rays, scopes, etc..... I KNOW the Lord did a miracle in Caed's little body! No one will argue that fact. But...he still has only a fraction of his small bowel left. Anatomically speaking......he will have "issues" the rest of his life.

What seems scary to me now contemplating the possible source(s) of the pain, may actually be God's way of showing us something incredible! Perhaps by uncovering some great blessing..... I don't know. I honestly have NO idea how the next few weeks are going to play out. (thank God!) Will it be an easy fix with some ABX for bacterial overgrowth? Or will, dare we say....surgery be needed? There is only ONE person who knows the answers to those questions, therefore I desperately need to stop trying. We need to take it one day (night) at a time. Count our blessings....they are as many as the stars, and ultimately TRUST in the One who holds it all together!

As the song says....."He ALWAYS comes through!!!"