My most favorite family tradition we have is our Christmas tree. For 20 years the "theme"of our tree has been our growing family and my love for photography . Each year I find a new photo frame with the current year inscribed somewhere on the ornament. We either set the trusty tripod up or search for the just the perfect family picture from the current year. I love looking at all 21 ornaments, remembering the exact day and time each photograph was taken. Our first photo ornament dates back to 1995, the year Todd and I started dating. They take me back. Back to various seasons in our family where both joy and grief dwelt. Specifically over the past 10 years, as I have hung those priceless ornaments on the tree, two words always overwhelm me: "God's faithfulness." The longer our family unit exists, the more deeply I see it. It is interwoven just as the lights and ribbon encompass our tree. Its beauty takes my breath away. Literally.
Another favorite family tradition extends beyond the 4 walls of our home. It dates back to 1998 and has continued every year since. The quality has drastically changed, as well as the faces that are hidden inside. It is our yearly Christmas gift to my parents. At only $12.95, it is the one item they have said they would rush to if their house was ever engulfed in flames. Why? Why would these yearly photo calendars mean so much? Yes, pictures are priceless. Most everyone would agree with their sentiment. But as I was pulling each one out of the box this weekend, I was expecting the usual joyous, entertaining stroll down memory lane. Instead I was struck with something far more powerful. It was by no means the first time I had looked back through them in recent years...but this time I was all alone. Just me, my thoughts, and my deep analytical heart. Our first calendar was made up of 10 people, including my parents' first 2 grand-babies (that number has now grown to 15). As I closed one calendar and opened the next, and the next, and the next....18 times over, tears flooded my eyes. A lump formed in my throat and the breath in my lungs seemingly was being sucked right out of my body. I was consumed. Overwhelmed by God. Just as my own family's Christmas tree reminds me each year of God's faithfulness, these calendars represent the exact same thing, but extend to a larger group of people. The joys of each new grand baby being born or adopted into our family from the other side of the globe.... From toothless grins to braces, first days of school to monumental graduations, Little League to college athletics, PICU to back flips, "playing animal doctor" to working for an animal doctor, Cinderella crown to Prom Queen, from Aiken to China to Brunei....oh my! What incredible stories these pages could tell! Yet, without fail, every calendar also spoke pain, uncertainty, and tremendous fear and sadness. To see beyond the photographs, to remember the various seasons of life each family lived through and endured...was paralyzing.
Psalm 100:5 "For the LORD is good and his love endures forever; His faithfulness continues through all generations."
The overwhelming emotion I experienced looking at these photographs (chronologically) is hard to describe. It was not just joy, yet my heart was bursting of it. It was not solely sadness or grief, yet my heart also equally ached of losses represented. Rather the faithfulness and love of my Father God stirred something inside me that was numbing. It numbed every bitter/sweet memory, forced me to stand back and visually SEE how He has never left us. As I glanced quickly over the 18 years spread across the living room floor, peace covered me like a soft, warm blanket. All the stress and uncertainty I was experiencing allowed me to stop, rest, and remember. I was calmed by the fact that God has been so so good to our family. The days have not been easy, some have been down right scary. Yet, time after time He has proven Himself faithful to us. Not just the 18 years represented in the calendars, but for generations. His love has been steadfast, never wavering. His provisions have been timely and perfect.
As I sat and wondered what the next "18 calendars" might look like, a smile came across my face. I know hard days will most definitely continue to descend upon us, days in which we will question whether we have what it takes to carry on, and pain-filled torrential tears will still crash to the floor. New precious faces will soon make their debut into our calendar tradition, as well as the endless sweet days that naturally accompany them. Even though we may not know what future chapters of the Everitt Family's Story will entail, we confidently rest in the same mercy, grace, love, and faithfulness that has carried us this far.
THAT is the most treasured gift my family has been given...and one that a house fire could never destroy.
2 comments:
Reading this, your words speak to my heart. I too get overwhelmed with stories of the past and photos as well. I love to tell my girls stories that I have heard for years and years. It is also the same feeling to imagine our futures! It makes me so sad to see how fast our kids have grown.
Lori, I have so enjoy your writings both past and present. You have so many talents,but the one I enjoy most is the way you write! Ever since the health trials concerning Cade, I have been so blessed by your writings! You express the facts of a matter,but you also express your feelings as well as others in your writings. You tell us the facts and the feelings of a situation without any boredom. You write in a way that the reader does not lose comprehension of your explanation of a subject or subjects. I know some of the family trials you have written about must be difficult, but they are very informative! I know it must be hard to express your feeling in times of trials, but I feel they must be a catharsis for you.
As we read our hearts are touched by your many tough experiences, We understand you know God is leading in these situations, however, it must be hard to keep trusting Him! I admire your sweet trusting even in the most difficult times. Thank you for sharing your trials with your audiences both near and far away! May our Lord continually keep you and your precious family in the palm of his hands!
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