The Blur

Happy 2nd Birthday to our sweet gift from God!!!





Oh, I could tell you stories about this little boy. He is stubborn, strong-willed, independent, dislikes females (but LOVES men),....sweet, funny, cuddly, an absolute JOY all rolled into one!!! It's like rolling the dice. You just never know which side of Caleb you're going to see. He is talking more and more each day, finally putting words together to make phrases. He loves Elmo ( & all the Sesame Street characters), his "B" (blankie), going outside!, finding ABC's, and being with "Ronnie & Haed." (Reagan & Caed) His newest obsession however is a little green superhero (on PBS) called SUPERWHY!!! It's a little amusing actually because I think in all honesty this show is meant more for 3-5 yr. olds. It's all about letters and putting them together to make words. Our little guy however is GLUED when this show comes on. (that's when Mommy does her best work around the house!) haha

Someone asked me a few days ago the birth weights of my children. I quickly rattled off 7'8 and 7'2....and then I froze. I honestly had NO idea!! Numbers kept running through my mind and yet nothing sounded right. Now, I know we can simply chalk it up to Caleb being the 3rd child. I definitely understand that. But, it was more for me. I then began thinking about the days Reagan and Caed were born. The exact times of their birth, etc.... And yet, still I couldn't remember anything about Caleb's! The conversation quickly changed, but this has continued to haunt me ever since. Caleb was 21 days old when Caed got sick. At that point....I lost that little baby, and didn't really get him back for almost a year.


(with some digging....I found out he weighed 7'13....and was born at 8:11 a.m.)


(less that 24 hrs. before Caed was rushed to ER)


(the night we officially got him back.....after 10 very long months!!!)



I had the great privilege of holding a very special newborn this weekend (Baby G). He was absolutely wonderful!! And yet, once again....it was hard on me. All I kept imagining was Caleb, and HOW MUCH I wished I could have had him at that age. To TRULY have him....to know him....and he KNOW me! I don't remember Caleb as a baby like I do with Reagan & Caed. It makes me sad...... All we have are pictures, and yet looking back at them only cause me to think "who IS this?? I don't know this baby!"

The verse that continued to come to mind this weekend was Joel 2:25 where the Lord says, "I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten...." I cling to that, and believe it with all my heart!!! I know that Caleb has no memory of his first year, unlike the rest of us. But, because of the yr. I was not with him, there is now a tremendous bond with the woman who WAS! It is heart breaking for me, and yet I wouldn't change a thing given the same circumstances. My parents (along with MANY others) were absolute God-given angels for us during that time. I will say from a Mother's perspective, I COULD NOT have handled both a newborn and critically ill child by myself. So for that, again we say THANK YOU from the bottom of our hearts!

We are pressing on. Looking to the future with hope and anticipation! GOD has done a mighty work in our family, and we KNOW He will continue using us to carry out His plan.

Thank you God for knowing we needed baby #3 (even though we fought You). Thank you for how You have continued to work all of this out...we see Your hand with every step!!!!